Every day as you scroll through social media, you are presented with an alarming number of proposal pictures. Beaming at the camera, happy couples brandish their flashy engagement ring which is only marginally brighter than their smiles.
It’s therefore easy to believe that the world is only inhabited by happy couples who’ve graduated from the Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively school of love. However, some relationships that are more akin Tom Cruise’s and Katie Holmes’ – toxic and best forgotten.
One person who can relate to that better than anyone is Craig Holden, pictured above, who sold the engagement ring he’d bought for his girlfriend of 10 years on Gumtree after they bitterly broke up. Rather than do it discreetly to save embarrassment, Holden made a spectacle of the sale.
The Welsh native was left heartbroken by his fiancée, who he likened to the spawn of Satan, when she cruelly declared that she didn’t love him anymore after he dedicated 10 years of his life to her. Rather than get revenge, Holden chose to get even.
He proposed after three years of dating, and the couple were engaged for seven years.
The 28-year-old listed the engagement ring that he bought for his girlfriend on Gumtree with a witty description which instantly garnered mass attention online. He listed the ring – which originally cost him $1,000 – on the site for a mere $200.
He’d make it clear that he hadn’t pulled the stunt for the money but for the thrill of badmouthing his ex on the internet for all to see.
“As a simple, quiet, reserved and generous gentleman I began courting a young lady (who would then spawn into Satan, through witchcraft or voodoo – who knew?) who I then regrettably proposed to,” he comically wrote.
“We were young everything was fine, then it began, the rage, it boiled, her eyes glazed over and her head span 360 degrees on a daily basis and she spewed venomous insults toward my aching heart,” he continued.
The sale instantly went viral online with Gumtree buyers flocking to the advert to grab a bargain which came with a complimentary chuckle.
“I, suffering from anxiety, thought I that was the problem, oh no,” he wrote. “What was the real problem was the possession of the Well Devil, a devil that dwelled in the depths of, well, wells… self-explanatory,” the heartbroken man continued.
“Fast forward to the ten-year mark, one day Satan awoke from its slumber and said ‘listen here mere mortal… I *SATAN* (can’t use her real name for legal reasons) don’t like you’ in a nutshell,” he wrote, with growing hysteria.
“So as I was about to unleash a torrent of truth upon the vile beast, Jesus appeared to me and said ‘listen here child, you must leave, you must go forth and become at one with your inner self. Become happy, I died for your sins, so go sinning bro!!’”
“So, I packed my bags and left,” he concluded, before adding, “The end – and now I’m happy.”
In the product description, he goes on to detail the ring as “size fat” before typing out a disclaimer, “Although worn by Satan herself, it does not possess any magical powers or any black magic. Cannot guarantee it’s 100% safe to be worn by those of faith.”
Do you feel sorry for his ex? Or do you think her spurnedfiancé handled it well? He certainly managed it better than this guy who broke up with his girlfriend in public. Or, at least, that is what the people around them thought:
We hope that Craig finds true love in the future.
