Let’s just face it: We’ve been riding a rhetoric of female empowerment for years now…but we’re still raising our daughters in a man’s world. We try to ignore that fact by telling our girls they literally «run the world.» They can have, do, and be whatever they can imagine. They are unstoppable. Undefeatable. Untouchable.
But then something happens that calls this into question for our girls. Maybe it’s a boy at school, an older brother’s friend…whoever it may be…there will be a time when a male is mean, rude, or even violent. This is the time we teach our daughters about respect, boundaries, and, ultimately, love.
You see, it’s easier for us to tell our daughters that when a boy is mean or rude or even violent, he’s that way because he likes her. This is supposed to protect our girls’ feelings: at least the unwanted behavior is coming from a place of being wanted. It’s not a rejection. Don’t worry. Boys will always just be boys. It’s up to you to ignore them.
Except, when we teach our daughters that this negative behavior is from a positive place, we endorse it — whether we mean to or not. We tell them their discomfort doesn’t matter. We tell them boys and men are the subjects, girls and women mere objects. Yeah, anyone else getting how horrible this sounds in 2017?
When our daughters come to us with problems with boys, it’s up to us to teach them to be strong — not submissive. It’s up to us to show them how they deserve to be loved, and that anything less is simply not worth the time or effort. Why? Because women don’t need the validation of men to make them whole — and neither do our daughters.
